Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Setting Up Your Married Kids with Your Friends' Married Kids is the New Setting Up Your Single Kids with Your Friends' Single Kids

Most of mine and Matt's friends are single (save for one of my girlfriends who recently started dating one of her coworkers and another one of my girlfriends - who is 23, mind you - who recently started dating an 18-year old high school senior. Yeah...we're still having sit-downs about that one). We've reached the point where, while we still love our single friends - they do make up the majority of our wedding party and come in handy when we need time without each other - we would certainly love to have some Couple Friends that we can share. My friend A (the one who's dating her coworker) and her new boyfriend are a start; he's older - in his early 30s - and is the most decent guy she's dated in...well...he's probably the most decent guy she's ever dated. We have a lot of fun with them and they're certainly a start to making friends in coupledom, but the grown up in me is yearning to throw a dressy cocktail party complete with h'ors douvres, quiet conversation, and easy listening in the stereo.

In passing I happened to mention to my mom that Matt and I were having a difficult time finding these elusive "Couple Friends." (I should mention that my mom is the quintessential dive-head-first-into-your-kid's-social-life mom. Before I met Matt, she always had a "nice boy" she wanted me to meet.) It gets tough during this time to make new friends: both of us have coworkers who are significantly older than us not to mention Matt has not a single coworker in a happy relationship; we're not going to school full-time and I've never met a good friend in a class anyway (except when I was living in the dorms where I was likely to see more of people in my classes); and how else do you make new Couple Friends in your early- to mid-twenties? We have no kids therefore we're unable find common ground and befriend the parents of the children we send our kids on playdates with (ah, the vicious circle of "setting up" your children). The only other option it seems would be to set up our single friends with our other single friends, but unfortunately, that is an option we've already exhausted.

My mom - apparently suffering withdrawals from being detached from the ability to "set up" her kids as all of us are now married (or nearly married, in my case) - took it upon herself to call up one of her friends whose daughter and her husband also live in Reno, and since, we've been unable to escape the throes of having this couple shoved in our faces (we still haven't actually met them, so there's a good possibility that on their end they're also suffering the same spiel of us being such a "neat couple." Maybe one day if we do meet we'll find common ground on the topic of our nosy mothers/mother-in-laws). It started out with my mom calling Matt one day when she knew I wouldn't be home and cornering him into a conversation of how her friend's son-in-law and Matt have so much in common because Friend's S-I-L lays tiles for a living and Matt works with concrete for a living. She makes a point of mentioning how they're also having such a difficult time finding a nice couple to hang out with and leaves Matt with the couple's phone number (which incidentally, we totally forget about).

Next we had my mom's friend calling us (which honestly leaves me wondering if my mom called the other couple - do you suppose they discuss these things? That they have a "method"?). She left the world's longest message on our answering machine to the tune of some magical journey we could embark on with her daughter and son-in-law where we would retrieve the Holy Grail and save the world (I'm being mildly facetious there - the message was actually something about her son-in-law losing his assistant and how she was hoping Matt would know someone needing a job. The urgency of the need of a new employee seemed low, once again leaving me wonder if this is all part of the "method" - one couple helps the other couple out with a dilemma, couples bond, become the best of friends, everyone comes out happy, even parents who also happen to be friends with each other - I'm sure the moms have already planned a quadruple date).

Coincidentally (or please hope to GOD that it was merely a coincident), I happened to run into my mom's friend today - she was getting a pedicure at the salon where I have my nails done. She didn't spot me when I walked in the door, so I grabbed up a magazine and buried my face in it in the waiting area debating how rude it would be to pretend I didn't recognize her. Well. It registered pretty damn high on the Rude Scale, and I simply can't be that awful of a human being. I went over and said "hi," and she immediately asked we'd gotten her message the other night and if we planned on giving her daughter and son-in-law a call. I said yes, she said that was wonderful because she was certain me and her daughter would get along swimmingly (she didn't actually say "swimmingly"), and we exchanged the usual banter that is exchanged between a girl and her mom's friend.

After the incident at the salon, I called Matt and left him a message about how this couple must be our "couple soul mates" or something for the continued insistence from my mom, her mom, and now, apparently, God is in on this, too, so needless to say, we should probably call them. Or maybe it's all just a part of the "method."

Things with the wedding are great - I just can't seem to get a firm grasp on how quickly it's coming at us. We finally registered on Sunday, which ended up being a nightmare. Matt is the stereotypical "please don't make me do anything" groom, so I was grateful to get him to at least come register for gifts with me. Unfortunately, the first store has a very poor system for registering (and it's a big name store, too, but I'll spare them the publicity, be it good or bad) - they have one of those scanner guns, but they have no bar codes to scan!! One has to actually type in every single SKU number. Now, the whole reason we registered at this store in the first place was because Matt's mom recently bought us a very nice bread knife (don't ask...) at this store and we decided to register for the rest of the knife set. All the knives at this store are in a display and have NO VISIBLE SKU NUMBERS thereby making it extremely difficult and time consuming to register for these knives - while Matt, who has minimal patience when it comes to anything, stood around and looked at pots and pans, I had to wait for a new employee go through stock books, computer logs, and catalogs to find the SKU numbers for our knife set, and then, when she finally find them, I had to type them in as she read them off to me, each knife individually. Poor Matt - this is like his personal hell. Thankfully the other two places were much easier and would've been more enjoyable if the first store hadn't ruined Matt's entire day...

Yesterday I had my dress alteration appointment. It felt so great to have my dress on again, I almost broke down into tears. It just keeps getting closer and closer at an ever-quickening pace. As it turns out, I gained a little weight since I bought the dress, so where it was a little too big initially, it fits perfectly now (and I mean perfectly), so instead of having to pay for pricey take-ins, I only had to pay for a bustle for my train. I was telling the cashier how great it was that me gaining weight saved me some money and she told me I was the first bride she'd ever met who was actually glad to have gained weight. Well, if the dress fits....(get it? It's a play on the saying "if the shoe fits." Get it?? Har har). Also, after the help of an unnameable source, Matt was able to track down his long lost groomsman. Everything is falling into place beautifully - I only hope things stay this way. It's when things start to go wrong that I start to go crazy! :)~


Blogger Courtney said...

Don't you just love meddling mothers? My mother isn't that way thank God but my friends mom is and she gets in on my life as well as her own daughters. Those kinds of mom's really do pull through for ya once in awhile. I am glad you found the lost groomsman and that the wedding planning is going hmmmm lets say "swimmingly" hahaha.

5/31/2006 7:51 PM

Blogger Nikki said...

Yay for finding the lost groomsman! (Is it just me or does that sound like a movie title or something?) I'm so happy things are falling into place for you.

I'm not sure why, but it's hard to find good couple friends! I think right now it's because we still live in a college town. Hope you find some soon!

6/01/2006 7:32 AM

Anonymous Jennifer said...

Its hard to find couples that BOTH of you actually like. We just told our bestest friends in the whole world goodbye yesterday... it was so sad. :( But thats military life for you.

I'm glad the dress fits. Now just stay that EXACT size!!!

6/01/2006 10:54 AM

Blogger CaliValleyGirl said...

Man...I am sooo excited about your wedding too. Can't freaking wait for you to post pics of it all. It's so crazy that the deployment is behind us now, and it is wonderful to see how the bad stress of the deployment is being replaced with the exciting stress of wedding planning.
I was sitting in the car today with my bf in traffic, cursing the situation, when I thought....gees, a year ago, I was ALONE in traffic...get over it. Life is sooo sweet now!

6/01/2006 2:14 PM

Blogger Blaez said...

*cheers* to the dress fitting!

Adonis was mentioning the other day about letting go of our single friends... I don't wanna let go of them, I want to just add more, like couple friends like he wants. I'm a "packrat" I guess.

Congrats on finding the LostGroomsmen. You should write a script and send it to hollywood. It'd make a lovely Romantic Comedy!

6/02/2006 6:31 PM


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